Some days you wonder if you should have just stayed in bed. I thought about journaling about my day Monday, but in my heightened emotional state Monday night, decided to give it some time. So now, from the wizened perspective of two days on, I will add the events of Monday, 27 April to the Melton family historic record.
Monday dawned a cool spring morning. I coaxed the kids out of bed as usual for scripture reading and prayer where I had to continue prodding to keep them awake, after which, they filed off to get ready for school. I say that loosely. A few got dressed (& ran next door to their piano lesson), one started goofing off with his little brother, and one went back to bed. At 3 min to go-time (when the Expedition departs the garage) as I was raising my voice at one child to get his shoes on (for the 10th time), and encouraging 2 others to get their teeth brushed, and for someone to take the dog out. The one who went back to bed (Noble) wandered up the basement stairs to inquire what time it was. When I replied that we were leaving in 3 min he started a desperate negotiation to buy enough time to shower. I told him, "Too late. Skip the shower." Even though I knew very well that my 8th grade son would sooner sign away his long board than go to school (where there are girls to impress) without completing his full morning hygiene regimen (shower, hair dryer, teeth brush, mouth wash, deodorant, hair coiffing paste). In some unexplained time-bending phenomenon, he trotted out to the car as we loaded up 5 minutes later (we managed to give him 2 extra min) showered and fresh (but without breakfast).
After dropping the kids at school I pulled into the driveway and noticed the dog (that stupid dog!) standing there in my garden. The garden I had spent the
ENTIRE day Friday cultivating and planting. He had dug up all my mounds, trampled all my seed beds, and topped it off by pooping in the peas. I stomped out in my pj's and tried to lure him out, to which he responded by growling his "I dare you" growl at me when I approached him. (I admit to repeating under my breath the words, "I hate that dog. I hate that dog...." again and again.) When I finally got him out of the garden and fixed the wire fence around the garden which I thought would keep him contained (my first mistake). I went in to get on with my day.
After dropping Abner off at preschool, I came home to do my exercise and clean up from breakfast. As I walked into the basement to get on the elliptical I was greeted by a giant mess, making it quickly apparent that certain children had shirked their weekend duties. Then I walked into their bedrooms. Ugh....walking into my kids rooms is stress-inducing. A half eaten banana, empty dishes, dirty clothes on the floor, clutter...Before you ask, yes we DO have rules prohibiting all these things. (Last week in the boys room I found something extra special....ever heard of a trucker bomb? Yes...that. The suburban version. It's a good thing that I have learned to be suspicious when I see something out of the ordinary. I didn't need to open the container to confirm my suspicion. Later, when the culprit offered his excuse, it was pretty laughable. Ask me sometime. Oh, these boys.) I made a mental note (several) to talk with the guilty parties after school, and withhold allowance.
11:15 rolled around and I picked Abner up from preschool. Once home he started in on the raisins in the pantry. Every time I turned around I found him breaking into a new box of raisins. I kept shoeing him away, and he would return after a short time. Like a mosquito. I finally asked him to go play outside while I finished cleaning up. He asked if he could take a treat to the dog. I said yes. So Abner began rummaging through the pantry to get a dog treat himself. It wasn't long before he managed to knock a full quart jar of last year's applesauce off the shelf with a crash.
*sigh*
I came and took him by the hand, led him around the impact zone, handed him a dog treat, and expressed my frustration. I told him to GO OUTSIDE. So he did. I spent the next 10 minutes cleaning up broken glass and a quart of splattered applesauce off all surrounding surfaces.
No sooner had I finished the applesauce clean up, than Abner casually walked through the garage door and announced that the dog was out. "Out? What do you mean, 'out'?!" I deduced from my hasty 30 second conversation with my 3 year old that Abner had opened the driveway gate and River had made his escape. I ran out and started calling for River. Nothing. I asked Abner where he went. He was a little bit vague, but pointed down the road. I grabbed my keys and ordered Abner into the car, and I called Mike. (Again, the words: I hate that dog. I hate that dog....) Mike apologized, but there wasn't much he could do. We drove around the block, asked a neighbor to keep an eye out, at which point I was ready to surrender River to his fate. When we got back I decided to look more thoroughly in the next door neighbor's back yard. As I walked toward the back corner of their yard I saw River's hairy head pop up and look at me. Caught! I tied River up in the house and got back to the normal demands of the day (trying to get up to speed after missing my Young Women's leadership and class presidency meetings the day before for my parent's mission farewell, attempting to set up last minute visiting teaching visits, finishing plans for Tuesday's YW activity, laundry, etc.).
The usual time for Jessie's arrival from school came and went. Sometimes she checks in and asks to stay after for different things, but I hadn't heard anything from her. I finally tried calling her and she texted back that she had stayed to study for the upcoming AP examination. I made another mental note to talk to her about communicating better with me ahead of time.
Meanwhile, Abner ate about 500 more raisins.
On the way home from the Montessori school I brought up my concerns about the disastrous state of the basement and bedrooms. Groans from the kids. This continued after we got home which led me to get even more frustrated and tense and stern with the kids, right in the middle of which Jessie decided to call for a ride home. Under the circumstances I was short with her over the phone, then apologized and explained some of the contributing frustrations of my day. She was already offended when I picked her up for taking my frustration out on her over the phone. I immediately took that bate and got all up in her face for not letting me know she would be late coming home from school. To which she responded that she HAD told me last week sometime (I vaguely remember this), by informing me (in passing) that there would be an AP study group meeting alternately A days one week and B days the next. What? I CANNOT keep track of which days are A or B days and I CANNOT be expected remember all her MANY commitments. I require frequent communication. I explained all this to her, and told her how important it was, especially on a day like that one where I had stuff coming at me left and right.... but she just got more angry and sassy. I tried to stay calm, but I am pretty sure I had a little bit of talk-show-head-swagger ("oh no you di'n't") going on as I told her she was out of line.
After that I cried. First, not the last, time that day.
Meanwhile, Abner ate 200 more raisins.
I picked up my shopping list and got ready to head to the grocery store, but not before pleading with Noble to PLEASE help out while I was gone, and to set an example of positive attitude for everyone (noting that Jess was still sulking around). And I went to the grocery store with red eyes.
We had dinner sans Mike (he was teaching a Monday night Econ class) where I proposed that we all help with some much-needed weeding in the yard after our meal. More sour attitudes. But I had anticipated this, and while at the store picked up coconut Sobes to offer to anyone who would help me. And thus my crew was assembled.
As we headed into the yard Tillman ran to tell me that he thought Abner might have thrown up in the hallway. I told him to go find out for sure. After a more thorough investigation, the verdict was not throw up but diarrhea in the hallway. So I left the weeds to the kids and went in to take care of Abner. Just as I feared:
too many raisins. After cleaning Abner up in the shower, we returned to the weeding where we actually made some good progress (most satisfying part of the day so far).
At this point I was running out of stamina and made a deal with Noble and Tillman that they could watch an episode of Top Gear if they would do the dishes and clean the kitchen. They eagerly agreed, and I sat down for a moment of much needed repose. But when I walked out to check on them I found the kitchen still a mess and that my kitchen crew had completely dropped the ball - each blaming the other. Fed up, I took over and did the dishes, and after a not-so-harmonious family prayer, sent EVERYONE to bed without discussion (except Jessie who had more homework to do).
Later, I split the little boys up and sent Sully to go to sleep in my bed because they were wrestling instead of sleeping.
With the dishes done, and totally worn out, I sat down on the couch. I had a headache.
Later when Mike got home, he came over to condole with me about my day. I was so tired I soon got up to go to bed, picking things up as I went. I walked into the bathroom, eyes half -closed with exhaustion and sat down to use the bathroom, only to discover to my despair that Sully had gotten out of our bed, used my bathroom (half-asleep I am sure) and peed all over the toilet seat. The one I was sitting on.
I cried. Again. (Mike says I screamed. That was probably true.) That was the last straw. I cried as I turned the shower on and washed myself. Mike was a sympathetic spouse and came to clean the bathroom while I cried myself out of the shower and into bed. Where I slept SOUNDLY.
My consolation is that Tuesday was a great day. Luck will always change. You just have to wait long enough.
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