The thing about busy, busy living is that you don't have as much time to emotionally process the big transitions. The week leading up to T.'s baptism I kept thinking,"this is an important occasion - I should be more focused" - right before I rushed off to the next appointment/kid activity/household chore.
Even the morning of the baptim was nuts. Crazy. Tillman had a basketball game - Mike went. At home as I tried to clean the house and prep for visitors and lunch afterwards, we were watching some extra little people (my bro's kids), while my kids were bickering and for some reason, unable to dress themselves. I confess, there was some yelling. Plus, I was pouting because my parents were out of town for the big day.
I was feeling sorry for myself & wound up pretty tight.
Lecturing a couple of kids in the car on the way over, I thought, "this is NOT the way this is supposed to go."
Once I got there, I couldn't stop the tears - because my heart couldn't stay all closed up anymore. I finally I had time to think about Tillman growing up and covenants and the love of a Heavenly Father.
And it turned into a beautiful day.
I love you, Tillman.
2 comments:
Yay for Tillman! I'm sure your family had a wonderful day, in spite of the rocky start. Those days always seem to go like that at first... why?
Oh I SO know how you feel. You're so frustrated and mad and determined to stay that way, and then you stop and realize how wrong it all is. Lots of tears for me too. Love you Ang!
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